The ideal vacation? Driving a cheap rental somewhere I’ve never been

Colin
By Colin Wood
Sep 24, 2024 | Column, Blog, Puerto Rico | Posted in Columns | Never miss an article

Photography by Colin Wood

I push down on the gas pedal of the base model Nissan Kicks rental as the incline of the narrow mountain road ahead of me increases beyond anything most Floridians would see in their entire lives.

Despite the audible increase of engine noise, the forward (or, rather, upward) momentum of the Kicks does not increase.

To my right is my wife of five years. To my left, a narrow patch of rough tarmac barely wide enough for a motorcycle to pass. Beyond that? An expansive vista of Puerto Rico’s jungle-like interior–with very little in the way to prevent us from tumbling off the mountain path.

Now, there have been very few moments in my life in which pushing the gas pedal to the floor has been necessitated–a handful of autocrosses and a track day at the FIRM–but I had the unique experience of adding “a narrow mountain road with no guardrails in rural Puerto Rico with my wife in a car that’s not mine” to the list.

At that moment, I turned to my wife to inform her that my foot was, in fact, planted to the floor.

For some reason, she didn’t share my enthusiasm.

Luckily, we eventually made it up and over that stretch of road, and made it to our destination for that day, the Hacienda Muñoz coffee plantation. (Which, by the way, I could write up another whole blog about growing coffee.)

[Driving tips from the other side of the world]

Why was I in Puerto Rico? For a well-deserved vacation, naturally, but also a special occasion for my wife I: Five years of marriage–though we'd been together for 10.

While exploring Old San Juan on foot and getting the rare chance to experience a rainforest without needing a passport were some of the best moments of the trip, it’s hard to overlook the couple of days we had a rented Nissan Kicks to kick around the island in. (Yes, pun intended.)

Not unlike other places I’ve visited, I had to quickly adapt to how the locals drive. But Puerto Rico was something different.

This isn’t to say that Puerto Ricans are bad drivers, but the rules of the road in Puerto Rico very much felt like suggestions instead of rules.

Right of way? Virtually unheard of. If there is any open space, fill it. If you have the chance to make that turn at a four-way stop, you go for it whether or not you got to the intersection first.

The most unusual part for me, though, is if you attempted to drive that way on the mainland, you'd certainly get an earful from other driver's horns. Not so in Puerto Rico.

Very few drivers on the island ever seemed to drive with malice, and I heard very little in way of honking despite the wild maneuvers I regularly saw.

As for police cars, they frequently drive around with their lights on, whether or not they are on a call. The best advice if one appears in your mirror? Just move out of the way. Considering how bad of an infraction you’d have to commit to get noticed by a police officer, I think you’d know if you are about to get pulled over.  (Fun fact: Police units belonging to a municipality, like San Juan, have blue and green lights, whereas state police units will use the more traditional red and blue lights.)

Paying for gas? You go to the attendant first, tell them what pump you are getting gas at, and then hand them your card. They’ll hold it for you while you fill up your car. Once you are done, the attendant will swipe your card and then give it back to you.

Sadly, we only had the rental for a few days of our trip, but it’s the way to experience Puerto Rico if you plan on exploring outside of a major city like San Juan. A word to the wise, though: The farther you venture from those cities, the less likely the people you encounter will speak English.

And before you ask, “Are you sure you weren’t the bad driver?” I’ll have you know that I observed many of our Uber drivers and virtually ever other driver on the road behaving the same way.

Oh, if you’ve never had it, I’d recommend trying out carnita fritas (essentially fried chunks of pork, but I don’t think that description does it justice) with a side of maduros (sweet plantains)–though I won’t judge if you prefer the savorier tostones (unripe, green plantains that are smashed and fried–often twice).

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Comments
J.A. Ackley
J.A. Ackley Senior Editor
9/24/24 2:18 p.m.

Different parts of the world certainly have different styles of driving. Puerto Rico's style sounds a lot like what I saw in Mexico City. Glad you had fun on your vacation. Puerto Rico is definitely on my list of places to visit.

Colin Wood
Colin Wood Associate Editor
9/24/24 3:27 p.m.

In reply to J.A. Ackley :

It has everything that makes the Caribbean such a cool place to visit, but you don't need a passport and everywhere takes the same money you already have in your wallet.

I'd definitely like to learn some conversational Spanish before I go back, though. It didn't feel right having to ask just about everyone I interacted with if they spoke English.

RacerBoy75
RacerBoy75 Reader
9/24/24 3:29 p.m.

I had a Nissan Kicks for our trip to Costa Rica last July, and it was a total dog. It was a case of a semi-decent car being let down by it's truly horrible CVT. It would probably be fine in Florida because it's completely flat, but any place with hills, let alone steep hills, and you are constantly fighting the thing. A very fine line between lugging the engine trying to get up the hill, or ending up full throttle and the CVT finally selecting a shorter ratio and it being too much. No in-between!

Going downhill was also bad, no engine braking possible, so you end up riding the brakes constantly.

Glad you enjoyed Puerto Rico, I'm guessing it's similar to Costa Rica in that it's beautiful, tropical, and driving is always an adventure.

Colin Wood
Colin Wood Associate Editor
9/24/24 3:33 p.m.
RacerBoy75 said:

Glad you enjoyed Puerto Rico, I'm guessing it's similar to Costa Rica in that it's beautiful, tropical, and driving is always an adventure.

Yep, that pretty much sums it up. smiley

bmw88rider
bmw88rider GRM+ Memberand UberDork
9/27/24 9:24 a.m.

In reply to RacerBoy75 :

I remember on one of my visits to costa rica there was a ton of rain and the main highway from the coast back to San Jose washed out. So we were routed through the 300 class roads in the mountains. I thank god to today that I had a stick shift rental car. If I would have had the CVT version, I don't think I'd be here.

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