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Stealthtercel
Stealthtercel Dork
10/10/22 7:42 p.m.

First of all, Congratulations, & very best wishes to you both!

Secondly, our wedding was held in "cottage country," about 100 miles north of the city, so anyone who was driving up for the day (i.e., not staying over in the area) was VERY glad that we had arranged for finger-food to be available after the ceremony but before the reception, so they didn't have to stay hungry while our photographer took All The Pictures of everybody in the wedding party, and our respective families, in every conceivable combination. I heard from at least one guest afterwards that this gesture may have saved her husband's life (or at least he said it did.)

AClockworkGarage
AClockworkGarage Dork
10/10/22 8:06 p.m.

When you file for a name change it's not just your surname, it's your whole name. It costs the same.

So your middle name can be 'Danger'

hobiercr
hobiercr GRM+ Memberand UltraDork
10/10/22 8:26 p.m.

If you are getting married outside of a church (as we did), we had a wine bar set up at the ceremony site so people could have something to enjoy as guests were arriving, mingling, etc. I had been to a wedding where this was done and I loved it. Plus, I totally didn't care if people were holding a glass during the ceremony. It's a CELEBRATION!

Also, if you are using any services, caterers, etc., prep their cash tips in envelopes ahead of time. It just makes it easier to hand to them at the end of the night with a hearty "Thank you".

BTW, our 14-year anniversary is tomorrow! Oh, and hang your flowers, bouquets, etc., upside down where they can dry really well. Then you can put them in a vase for your cat to pose next to.

Oh yeah, and have your pup as your Maid of Honor/Best Man/Flower Girl/etc.

Sonic
Sonic UberDork
10/10/22 8:43 p.m.

When it is time for the group pictures, plan the pictures all ahead of time and then have a designated wrangler for each of those pictures who will get the right people there in the right groupings so you can just move through the groups and get this boring stuff all done quickly.  This way you aren't looking around waiting while someone goes and finds Aunt Susan or whoever, the wrangler will have already found her and gotten the group together.  

AnthonyGS (Forum Supporter)
AnthonyGS (Forum Supporter) GRM+ Memberand UltraDork
10/10/22 9:03 p.m.
aircooled said:

If you decide not to change your name, it's a good idea to have a copy of the marriage certificate handy (e.g. phone or copy).   

Makes it easier to explain why you are driving around some random persons car. surprise

OK, they live at the same address, but it's still a good idea.

This.  My first wife changed her name.  Now it's a mess as she married again and never changed it back or to the next guys.  My 2nd wife, no name change; partly because she is an only child.  She hyphenated for social media.  It's easier not to change these days.  

Andy Neuman
Andy Neuman SuperDork
10/11/22 8:17 a.m.

Have a receiving line after the ceremony to say hi to all the guests. A little time consuming and takes away from photos time. Then you aren't trying to make your way around to every table to say hi to everyone who came during the reception. This also seemingly limits the amount of time everyone talks to you but they all get the chance. 
 

 

SV reX
SV reX MegaDork
10/11/22 8:29 a.m.

I'm pretty sure you have already made your choices, so my opinion doesn't matter much. 
 

I don't think it is important  these days to change your name.

Im not a fan of hyphenating. My wife tried it when we got married, and it was years of mess. I don't recommend it. 
 

Have a fantastic time at your wedding!!

Scotty Con Queso
Scotty Con Queso SuperDork
10/11/22 8:34 a.m.

Prepare for cancellations. You know that flaky aunt/cousin/uncle/etc that's always a mess and never shows up? They are going to cancel showing up the night before. Even when they swear on their life they will be there. 

ralleah
ralleah GRM+ Memberand PowerDork
10/11/22 9:14 a.m.

My wife wasn't ever thrilled with her middle name, so when we got married, she changed her middle name to her old last name since she didn't want want to let it go completely. It ended up making many things easier that both her new and old name were part of her legal name. 

edit: this was all her choice, I didn't push her to change it at all.

Apis Mellifera
Apis Mellifera Dork
10/11/22 11:59 a.m.

Yes!  Another chance to trot out my favorite wedding day picture:

My advice: take a fun picture with a cool car.

Johnboyjjb
Johnboyjjb HalfDork
10/11/22 3:25 p.m.

You and your spouse are getting married. Not your siblings or parents or anybody else.

Low expectations are easier to meet. This applies for the wedding and beyond.

If you haven't committed to do something, don't commit to it now. The more optional things, and the less required things, usually the better.

The wedding night is historically terrible because you are both tired and hungry and stressed. So don't plan to do it. Let it happen naturally if you want, but setting yourself for disappointment generally leads to disappointment. That's what the next morning can be for.

akylekoz
akylekoz UltraDork
10/11/22 3:58 p.m.

We had plans to leave the reception at a predetermined time.  SWMBO was having a great time and didn't want to leave, I called the Limo company to cancel, agreed to eat the deposit.  Best decision ever.  They never charged me.

If your plan doesn't work out just go with the flow.   

Your wedding is about you, do what you want!

Instead of box cameras, just make sure everyone gets access to an email or drop box to send the photos from their phones.   And maybe a few box cameras for the technologically challenged.

sleepyhead the buffalo
sleepyhead the buffalo GRM+ Memberand PowerDork
11/7/22 10:00 a.m.

no to Box Cameras

Yes!  to a couple of Instax Mini's (and 4 or 5 cartridges) kicking around, and a corkboard to pin them on.

edit:
Also, Premature Congratulations!  and "Best of Luck"s too!

Katie Wilson
Katie Wilson Advertising Coordinator
11/8/22 12:31 p.m.

Thanks all for the well wishes and good advice! The wedding happened, it was awesome. The paperwork for the name change is STILL happening, but thankfully the next time I need a corrected ID is end of December so there's plenty of time for that. 

If I need to change my name for my passport, should I just renew it at the same time? My current passport expires 2024, which is after our honeymoon, but close enough that maybe I should just do everything at the same time?

wae
wae PowerDork
11/8/22 12:45 p.m.

In reply to Katie Wilson :

It may be different now but with my wife's we traveled with her original passport with old name and a copy of our marriage license and it was accepted.  When we had the name on the passport changed, we sent it in and they just printed something near the back that said something to the effect of "name change.  new name is: X".  When she renewed it, the name printed right inside the cover was finally correct.

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